B: Balance--embrace the chaos

I have two careers to balance—my full time work being a PNP, taking care of sick kids, and the one I’m trying to cultivate, being a writer. Because both are extremely demanding and don’t like to hear the word no, I’m often torn between them.  Who do I listen to: a sick kid or a brilliant inspiration from my muse?  Do I read the medical journals or write for my blog post?  Can I rearrange my weekend clinic schedule so I can make the writer’s meeting?  Writer’s conference or NP conference?  I enjoy one, but in the back of my mind I wish I could be in two places doing the other as well.

I learned a long time ago you really can’t balance your life.   Why?  Reality doesn’t happen in a vacuum and it doesn’t always follow your plans.  In life you have to make choices—what to buy, where to live.  Do you stay late at work or go to soccer practice with the kids?   With each decision you don’t just gain, you also lose.  If you choose to leave your sick kids at grandma’s or miss the dance recital, your family misses you.  If you choose to leave work your co-worker will have to pick up the slack and may not be able to go to their own kid’s scrimmage.  The work has to be done even if you aren’t there.

We talk about finding the balance between work and family.  I’m not dismissing family by any means.  I agree that on your death bed you won’t care about dirty dishes, but our work is more than just household chores. Your chosen career is important to you, sometimes as much as your relationships.  Balance means one doesn’t tip the other on the scale.  If you aren’t at work, you aren’t contributing to your place of employment. Places of business need people in order to stay in business.  Finding balance doesn’t mean always choosing family over work. Constantly ditching work is as unbalanced as being a workaholic.

I know our families need to know they’re most important, but do we really want to teach our children that commitment to work, agreeing to do a good job, is only important until something else you want to do more comes along?   If our kids learn bad work ethics they’ll won’t be able to get an education or hold down a job. Then they’ll never move out of the house and you’ll be cooking them breakfast the rest of your life.  That’s a lot of pancakes and maple syrup!

The way I figure it is this:  when you work, give 100%, even more.  Keep the missing work to a minimum.  When you play, play 200%.  Spend real time, not Facebook or Twitter time, with the people you love. Turn off the TV and talk to each other.  Give up on the idea that you can have it all.  You will leave your coworkers hanging at times.  You won’t make every soccer game.  You’ll disappoint people.  Others will disappoint you.  Those who care about you are forgiving as long as we keep the need for forgiveness to a minimum.  That comes in balancing choices and letting go of trying to be and do everything.

We all have conflicting situations in our lives.  We all have to deal with others.  So, we’ll always have to make choices.  Sometimes the decision is obvious.  Sometimes it will be choosing the lesser of two evils. Balance comes when you stop listening to others on how life should be and find your own contentment, because in the end, equilibrium is achieved not when you do everything right, but when you’re a peace with knowing you’re not perfect and so therefore your life won’t be.   

Embrace the chaos.

A: Appear as the Professional Clown

Clowns are iconic.  You don’t even have to know the clown to form an opinion.  For some it’s happy memories with grandparents at the circus.  For others their palms sweat and their hearts race.  John Wayne Gacy and Pennywise come to mind. In our culture we expect it and even have a disorder for it: coulrophobia. 

 True clowns are professionals complete with a code of ethics and conduct.  They’re all about making people laugh and feel better about themselves.  They go to hospitals to help in healing through laughter.  They hang out at circuses and entertain us.  They make animal balloons to cheer kids at birthday parties.  There’s always those that will make the clown something to be feared.  It makes it difficult for those who use the clown profession to help people.  I’m sure they don’t appreciate their job being made harder, having to overcome the negative connotations.

We expect a certain appearance from clowns: make up, red nose, big shoes. Clean lines and smiles evoke happiness, a professional clown.   Make that make up run and we’ve created something sinister.  Scary clowns, well, scare people. 

Look at a man in a Brooks Bros. suit and Prada shoes and you think business man.  Put a big red nose on him and you get a whole different response. Maybe jokers on Wall St?  The man was dressed impeccably. But change one thing—the red nose—and opinion changes.  

Think about your job.  What does changing one thing do for you?  Does it gain you respect or downgrade your image? What’s your company’s dress code?  What’s the implied conduct for your profession?  I know times are changing with respect to appearances, especially in the realm of body piercing and tattooing.  But these images have stereotypical ideas. A good tattoo artist will remind you to think before you ink.  Why?  Because businesses aren’t in it for their employees personal freedom of expression.  They’re in it for the ones who bring in money, i.e. the customer.  That’s why they have protocols for dress, language, and actions. 

Stereotypes may not be fair, but they’re a fact of life.  Consider your appearance at work. Does your personal statement overshadow perceived respect for your office and clientele? In your conversations do you consider those around you, especially those who might overhear?  To customers perception is as powerful as reality.

What you do in private is your business.  Do it in public and everyone has to experience it.  Your actions are your personal right, but customers also have rights.  They have the right to take their business elsewhere. Employers have rights. They can hire someone else who they feel would better suit their company’s image.

Clowns don’t want people to be afraid.  They want clean makeup lines and smiles so people see them as fun and someone to come back to when they need a laugh.  It’s just good business. In your job do you stand out as the professional to come back to over the competition when they need your service?  Are you the one to keep when layoffs occur?

It doesn’t matter if you’re a CEO, a clown, a health care provider, or barista at Starbucks.  Your appearance matters to others whether you like it or not. That should matter to you.

Choose to be the professional clown.

Alphabet Soup

Today starts the A to Z Challenge.  I'm excited to see what others are going to post and to see if I'm up to the challenge.  I have to say I've been working on my posts early since I know I'm never satisfied and edit and re-edit and even after posting think "oh, I could've said that better."
When I told my non-writing friends I was going to start this challenge they gave me the usual that sounds crazy look.  One told me I can't write for 26 seconds, let alone 26 days.  But, from the number of people who've signed up, I can see I'm not alone in thinking this sounds fun. 
So, I'm going with a theme:  professionalism in the work place.  Why chose this?  In my career as a nurse practitioner I've seen so many areas where patient care and satisfaction has gone down due to lack of professional conduct.  I read articles on the subject and realize this isn't just isolated to health care.
However, it got kind of boring, so I'm trying to take different spins on it. Technology has opened up a who new way of Networking and while Appearances matter, work is supposed to be Fun and a place to show Creativity along with Integrity.  Otherwise we don't stand a Ghost of a chance. 


Up for the Challenge!

You get the idea....